If shouting, confiscating toys and gadgets, and even turning off the Wi-Fi doesn’t cut it anymore when it comes to discipling your kids – you might want to try this smart strategy a mom of three in Singapore is using.
In a post shared on Facebook, Leza Klenk says she hates raising her voice and doesn’t hit her kids, so she decided to promote good behaviour with a system she calls the “Jar of Pain”.
Simply put, it’s like the old “swear tin” your mom had at home: she deducts money from her kids’ pocket money when they don’t do what they’ve been told or they’re behaving badly.
How it works
How it works, she explains, is that her kids will get a lighter or heavier fine depending on the “crime”. So, for a small offence, like leaving the table before everyone has finished eating or not hanging up a towel, they’re fined R6, but if they’re acting out, or don’t their homework before sleep time, they’ll be fined R12.
“In the end…they’ll feel the pain of losing their gadgets and money, so automatically, they’ll learn,” explains Klenk in her post.
But it’s not all for nothing, she adds. At the end of the month, the money from the “Jar of Pain” is used to pay for a family dinner at a restaurant or a fun activity.
If you’re keen to try this discipline method, Leza advises against creating an outrageously long list of offences – she says no more than 10 works best.
“This puts children under pressure, thinking they’re always on thin ice,” she says. “Just reasonable possible ‘crimes’ but bear in mind to let them also be mischievous and creative as children. Kids don’t grow best in very #regimented households.”
While parents have cheered the mom’s strategy since she shared her tip a few weeks ago, some have argued that while it sounds great, it might not work on all kids as you have to take your kid’s personality into account when you discipline them.
Whatever strategy you use, there’s one thing we do agree on and that this is a great way to teach your kids that there’s always a cost associated with bad behaviour.
Content editor and writer on Living & Loving, Sonya has over 25 years experience in the media industry. She edited Living & Loving magazine for six-and-a-half years and is the former editor of Longevity magazine. She’s won numerous media industry awards and is passionate about the health and wellbeing of moms and children.
Outside of work, she enjoys trying out recipes, reading crime mysteries and thrillers, practicing yoga, and exploring new destinations.
Learn more about Sonya Naudé.